By all the gods....

Its Hot!!!!! so hot in fact that several exclamation marks seemed necessary...... and after a very eventful month the Beard is wishing that maybe the gulf stream could be switched off for a month or two.... we'd drop by about ten degrees, and I'd be a lot more comfortable..... and of course, despite picnics by canals during working hours (and all legitimate... I love my job sometimes...) very nice weekends with a certain young lady, and a discussion about Norse myth with that personage elder son, we are all mourning the deaths of Farrah Fawcett and Molly Sugden..... I wonder whats going to happen to her pussy..... little Are You Being Served related reference there..... but there we go... but the abiding topic remains the heat.... now, I'm not a big fan of the heat, or indeed summer..... autumn is definitely my favourite season, followed by winter and spring in close order.... but i've justbeen disturbed by the mating cry of a vixen who frequents my garden.... and after having a watch through the window I've totally lost track of what i was going to say.... so in the best tradition of Beardiness, I shall say nothing... except that until we all get as cool as we would wish to be, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

So.. a day of small successes for the beard... first of all, a good working day in the sun, with parks, rivers and cast iron beds, a good deal on a mini laptop (or net book or whatsoever they calleth these new fangled thingys...) a found passport, thus enabling the dream if not the reality of foreign travel....one day i may get to abroad.... possibly as far away as Berkshire.... but I digress.... also, a mini maglite has surfaced, a lost poem, the log book for my van, and I've remembered Greg Evigan, in BJ and the Bear.... but then someone has to.....possibly..... but I should possibly leave that to Richard Herring..... and a walk around Kirby Muxloe castle with Beard Junior.... watching the moorhens, and a lovely heron....i'm a big fan of herons, as you may or may not know... but that's by the by....which of course brings me to the subject of Cliff Richard.. but thankfully not for long, or for any real purpose....and of course the unsettling issue of age and whether it matters.... for instance, good old Cliff is forever young, taylor Swift was (according to one website) born in 2006, which makes her singing success all the more spectacular..... but its late, I've been fantastically distracted by the loving words of a certain young lady, and it really is beardy bedtime... so until we all can celebrate the little successes, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!

Healthier than fried Yogi....

so, it comes tothe Beards attention that Bear Grylls, that strangely young and beardles adventurer, is now chief scout, following in the tracking marks of such greaats as Lord Rowallan, George Purdey and Peter Duncan.... now, whether this choice is controversial or not is up to you, enlightened reader.... but to the Beard, the choice seems a sound one.... unfortunately, young Bear (although, to be honest he reminds me more of a mustelid... either a feret, or, being slightly more charitable, a pine marten....) has had, as part of his many interviews, been asked several times about the suposedly fake broadcasts that he made in the past.. with bill Turnbull (ex scout and bad knot tyer that he was) bringinging up the first Scout Law, that a Scout is to be trusted.... tohis credit, Bear has apologised on several occasions.... but, I hear you ssay, is a self confessed fake a ssuitable role model...??? well, to put in my peters pence, the answer is yes.. and why?? simply that he has kept to his promise for all his life.... the Scout Promise is a wonderful thing... when one takes it (as the beard did in his long ago youth, one promises to DO MY BEST to keep the Scout Law (emphasis by the beard hisself, to lapse into East Midlands...) the very late and very great Baden Powell, still my main hero along with Captain Scarlet and the man on the back of the plane in the Potomac, was very emphatic on the subject... he recognised that in a Scouts life therre would be times when, due to external pressure, worries, and so on, a scout would end up breaking the Scout Law... but as long as he (or she) did their best to keep it, recognised their lapse, and sought to make up for it, then that was ok by BP.. so it should be ok by us.... and as an aside, the Scout Law, so easy to keep with its emphasis on do and no don'ts at all, is, more so than any other list, a near perfect model of the ideal cosde of conduct, and as such bears publishing here.... from the Beards memory, which is slightly less than perfect..... A scout is to be trusted, a scout is loyal, a scout is friendly and considerate, a scout has courage in all dificulties, a scout is a member of the worldwide family of scouts, a scout makes good use of time and is careful of possessions and property, and a scout has self respect and respect for others... and if we had more of all that, we'd have a better world.... so until we all gryll our bears, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Richard the Third... and that's not rhyming slang....

but rather one of my favourite British (or fairly close to, anyway) monarchs, along with Canute, or Knut, Elizabeth I, and Macbeth, the last of whom deserves our sympathy simply for being married to someone called Gruach, which sounds like some archaic oat-based muesli.... but I digress.... today saw the Beard, along with the junior version, and a certain young lady paying our respects to the brave Duke of Gloucester, king for two years, and the last English King to die in battle so far.... as brave a man as one could wish to meet... and wouldn't history have been duifferent had he won....for a start we would have no Simnel cake at easter..... and that would apparently be a loss.... but it rounded off a fantastic weekend for all.... beginning at my second home (also known as the Scout Hut, for a car wash, during which the young lady's car became seen to be green, aa quick (or not so quick ) almost accidental fixing of the same car's cooling system, and the meeting of this beautiful person with the beard's parents over a carvery, the weekend wqs off to a good start.. and as to sunday, all I dare say is WOW!!! but yet again I digress... a strange encounter with the ex Mrs Beard and a lego brick was to follow, then a much appreciated trip to Wing Wah in Burton, that beloved all you can eatery.... and believe me, we ate! my usual behaviour in those places is simply to take a little bit of everything, and try it all... and sunday night was no disappointemnt.. the steak in red wine, although not seeming particualarly Chinese, was very tasty, and as usual, copious amounts of seaweed disappeared very quickly.... and the young lady herself was very impressed, despite the Beard becoming slightly distracted by the legs of another young lady sitting close by... but the hirsute one managed to pass it all off in the dubious name of research.. its all to do with novels, and the less said probably the better.... but today's bank holiday led us to the field of Bosworth, and the revamped visitor centre.... I remember going to it in the long agao, and sitting through old Billy's version of Bosworth fight, with larry Olivier doing his best crookback.... I must say the new film is far more accurate, and dare I say better acted.... and the CYL was very impressed, especially by the range of headgear available.... after a car-bound picnic (the Beard being proclaimed King of Tabbouleh) a stroll around the fields uncovered King Dick's well, and the alleged site of Good King Richard's death.... then a stroll around the canal, a discussion on the merits of the shewee, a cup of tea, and finally the drive home.... and a sorrowful parting.. but as I say, a great weekend..... and a few ideas.... the beard's plan for a kid's book is being well received in certain quarters, and several other possible publications are in the swimming around the head stage..... but of thsoe more later.... its time to hit the other pc (due it being severely uncooperative , and myself being a fan of the Regan method...)and get some of said ideas down in pixellated form.... so until we can all be brave in the thickest press of our enemies, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Climate Change....

or to give it its usual misnomer Global warming, has reared its ugly head again, and the selfish part of me wishes to thank it for giving the Beard some lovely weather for his holiday.... which, strangely enough took place in two places, if the repetition may be forgiven.. and I'm sure it will be... first of all, a lovely few days in Anglesey, within Roman Legion swimming distance of the North wales Coast, courtesy of a certain young lady.... the holiday that is, not tthe swim...and a good chance to meet the elder of her two sons, who proved to be delightful, intelligent and incredibly fair minded.... and i'm not just saying that because of who reads this..!!! A morning of birdwatching at South Stack, a paddle in the sea with the young lady in question, a trip to the sea zoo ( one of Beard junior's favourite attractions) and a view of some gorgeous paintings at Oriel Ynys Mon (the Great Orme sky thingies.. breath taking.. wish I could remember the artist's name...).... time for home came too soon, but luckily for some, a trip to the ancient city of Jorvik followed.. my young lady's first ever.... and a very good trip it was.. Kudos to the Cavalier guest house..... although the less said about the sherry the better..... ACYL was impressed by the Jorvik centre, entranced by the Castle Museum, and absolutely gobsacked by the Minster.... so much so that we returned the next day and climbed the tower.... a cruise on the Ouse, a bewildering walk through York Dungeon and an anoraking expedition to the Rail Museum followed, with the Beard becoming a slight celebrity due to his once having ridden on Tornado's footplate.. and if you don't know what I'm talking about, why not???? the food was lovely.. good breakfasts at the Cavalier, and I would recommend to everyone El Piano, a fantastic vegan and gluten free tapas bar.... the only restaurant the beard can recall where he could order anything at all from the amazingly good menu... and they offer a discount to holders of a York pass.. of which more later... but I digress.... I was going to make some wise or otherwise statements about limiting the popoulation in order to help the environment, but instead I've waffled about my holiday.... suffice it to say, York was a big hit, and so was the Beard..... on a sadder note, a friend of mine, Simon Grant, fellow scout leader and giver of sun glasses, unfortunately died aged 44 last week... he'll be sorely missed by all.... especially Jim Muller if he throws up in his tent porch again.... "Gone Home," as we in Scouting would say....but with reference to the old adage, our Cherie has brought new life into the world as we always knew she would... and if my judgement is good (and it often is...) she'll be a fantastic mum.... but I digress again.... i'm sure Simon would have wanted the Beard to stay upbeat, so until all our gobs are smacked, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

has it been this long????

the beard's life has been getting so busy of late that it seems the old blog, and its associated spelling and gramattical errors have been rather neglected.. which is a shame... or possibly not.... as you may know (I didn't...) this whole thing began as a way to get the old writing muscles working again, in order to restart the short and not so short story writing that has long been a beardly passion.... and it seems to have worked almost too well, with my hopefully forthcoming novel finally reaching 50,000 ish words, and several other bits and bobs happening.. on top of this Scouting, family concerns, and a certain young lady have been taking up my time.... in fact, (and thsi will surprise any familiar with the world of beardliness...) I spent time at a party the other night... held at a bar in good old Birmingham (still my favourite large conurbation) in honour of the birthday of a man I didn't even know existed.... but thankfully he turned out to be a work colleague of the beauty on my arm.... now, I say this will surprise many, for the beard is not really a party person.... in fact, the last time i went to a similar event i was about twenty years younger.... now, why i'm not really a party person will probably remain a mystery.... I have no objection to them in principle, but I believe the fact that i (through various means) avoided my own 18th speaks volumes..... being very fond of the sound of my own voice, the loudness of music tends to put me off.... as does the fact that alcohol is not my favourite tipple, and i have a remarkable tendency not to dance.. i even avoided doing that at my long ago wedding... which may explain a lot.... but I've always felt lonely, and parties just seem to reinforce that feeling of isolation, while promising to actually do the opposite..... all of which makes me sound a right miserable, not to mention ungrateful, bugger..... but there were a few triumphs during the night... it seems that my young lady's friends quite liked me, i got a kiss from the birthday boy, and best of all, i got to see my partner enjoying herself.... and this i think is what separates the bearded one from your average miserable party pooper... that i do in fact enjoy parties, but not in the same way as others... i like seeing people enjoy themselves, especially people i care about.... and i have to admit that my antipathy towards festivity (although to be honest, antipathy is too strong a word... even dislike is not mild enough.. perhaps antipasto would describe it better... or perhaps not....) is mainly down to the shyness that no one believes i possess.... for as some of my closer aquaintances will telll you, sometimes, i enter into the spirit, possibly too much occasionally..... and as any cod psychologist will tell you, the best way to overcome shyness is not to behave shyly..... which is what i usually attempt to do..... last saturday, i admit that i didn't screw my courage to the sticking place readily enough..... i admit i should have approached more people, put on my extrovert act and at least attempted to dance..... and next time i promise that i shall... and i never break promises..... but i don't digress, which is not a good sign.. easter week beckons, and with it travels to exotic and ancient cities... well, York and Holyhead anyway..... so bed calls me, and i must answer.. so until we alll become as shyless as we would wish to be, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

back again.. sorry....

So, herevwe are again, and first the beard offers apologies, both sincere and otherwise, for all those (and I know you are few...) who have been missing the regular missives from the world of beardiness..... but the beard which is wise and inebriates rarely has been having a busy time of it lately.... for those of you who have visited Beardsheim in the past, a surprise will be in store next time you cross the two tone bridge (still saving up for the full Rainbow model...) ... the Beard, with the incredibly useful help of Beard Junior, has actually been having a real sort out.. and I mean, a real one.... avoiding the piles of old rubbish, hoarded mathoms and offcuts of facial hair just got too much, and eing a great fan of arts and crafts, the wise one decided that if it aint beautiful and useful, it aint stopping..... so all i have left is a photo of Jenny Agutter, and a can opener..... seriously though, a lot of the accumulated stuff has gone.... although true to form, some of the more bizarre stuff has remained..... so much so that i have managed to rid the heim of five sets of shelves.... and my kitchen now appears to be the nine feet by eighteen that it actually is.... the lounge is basically tidy (apart from the boot-sale-bound boxes..) and the bedroom is unrecognisable..... all this partly due to the influence of a certain young lady.... on top of this, despite the amount of time invested, the beard has visited the cinema, gone to a concert, and has been regulary working on model railway projects and the upcoming novel...... all of which has been fantastic..... catharsis and relaxation, hard work that has actually been refreshing..... a strange ting... and the relatonship with that aforementioned young lady is growing stronger and stronger..... so things are on the up..... and up.... and up..... its very reminiscent of the scene in V for Vendetta (the comic.. not the film, which i still haven't quite seen.... but I digress...) where Evey says to V something along the lines of "don't you find that sometimes you want to get rid of the stuff from the past, and et on with the future.... " I'll try to find the exact quote if i can be bothered..... which brings me to the subject of Watchmen.... and my fervent hope that the americans haven't ruined the finest comic book ever written.... but as the second act of Siegfried begins to play, the Beard realises the time, and must fly... so until we can all have a jolly good clear out, Wisebeard salutes you!!!!!!!!!!